That’s never a word you want to hear. You try as hard as possible, do your absolute best and then…rejected!
Nobody likes being wrong and rejections makes us feel like we’re wrong, even if we aren’t.
You’re not the problem, but your view of rejection may be.
Rejection isn’t a bad thing. It can actually be a great thing, if you learn to harness the power of it.
Let’s start by looking at what we’re actually afraid of…
Why is Rejection a Bad Thing?
Rejection comes in many forms.
You didn’t get accepted. You didn’t get hired. You didn’t make the sale.
Whatever it is, you wanted it to happen and it didn’t. So why is that so hard to accept? You knew when you started that you may get rejected, so why is rejection so hard to handle?
Because we think people are rejecting us, as if we’re not good enough.
That’s not the case.
Think about it. Most often when we get rejected, they (whoever “they” are) don’t even know us. They’re not rejecting you personally. They are rejecting the product, the package, the application, etc..
Once you understand where the rejection lies, and that it’s not with you personally, you’re ready to use rejection as a weapon. If you can take rejection well and use it for your own benefit, you’re ahead of the game. You’re ready to grow.
Here’s how you can conquer rejection and use it to your advantage…
3 Steps to Conquer Rejection
Rejection can easily be conquered in three steps and once you start to conquer it, you will see the power of being able to use it properly.
Here’s the process:
- Re-frame Rejection – Stop viewing rejection as a negative thing. You won’t get anywhere in life without a little rejection (ok, maybe a lot). It’s going to happen, accept it and don’t be surprised when it does. Don’t view it as a personal attack, view it as an opportunity to grow.
- Take Action – Look rejection in the face and take action. Go do whatever you need to do or have been wanting to do. Submit the application, make the call, whatever it is, don’t be afraid of it. You should be doing things you can get rejected for; if you’re not, you’re probably not doing much.
- Get Rejected – Now go get rejected! If you’re taking a lot of action, you can expect a lot of rejection, and that’s a good thing. You can actually set rejection goals. For example, if you’re a salesman and one sale is typically made for every 20 phone calls, set a goal to get 100 rejections. If 19 people reject you out of every 20 calls, you’ll still get 5 sales!
If you’re in a field where you have the opportunity to get rejected often, that’s great! You can put this into practice right away. But the truth is, if you want to be successful, you need to learn to handle rejection. So if you’re not in a field where you have the opportunity to get rejected often, here’s an exercise for you…
Actionable Rejection Exercise
This exercise is solely for the purpose of conquering your fear of rejection by getting used to it. Get used to “no”, because for every yes, you’ll get plenty more nos. That’s how life works.
Here’s how the exercise works:
- Get a Guaranteed “No” – Too often, we expect a yes and then we’re disappointed when we hear “no”. Try asking for something when you know the answer will be no. You may be surprised if they actually say yes, but that’s better than the other way around. This can work by using Noah Kagan’s idea of asking for 10% off at Starbucks. Or you can make up your own. Go to a restaurant and ask them if you can have the appetizer for free. You don’t have to give them a reason why. Anything will work if you’re pretty sure the answer will be no.
The more you get rejected, the easier it gets. The easier it gets, the more opportunity opens up in your life. If you want anything worth having, you have to be able to accept rejection. At least until you get accepted.
Now go out there and get rejected. Your future success depends on it.